We all have that first memory of when we were a youngster. In remembering mine, I remember being four years old and hanging out with my dad at his friend’s house. We had just stopped at the store, on the way to his friend’s house, and he bought this gigantic balloon for me, so I’d have something to do while he visited with his friend. It wasn’t even into the first 15 minutes of his visit that my balloon got away and sailed into the heavens. All I remember doing was crying and chasing after it. Seeing this, my dad called me back, and we hopped in the car and chased after that balloon everywhere. It actually turned out to be a really fun time. Although we never caught the balloon, I’ll never forget the time I spent with my father chasing it.

Like I said, we all have certain aspects of life that we remember. We have those that we regret but sometimes those we regret turn out to be the ones we learn from the most and the ones that help us understand how important our Heavenly Father is to us. Growing up, I found myself just loving sports and going outside to do a lot of different things. Playing baseball was the passion I had. I remember those spring days and that freshly cut grass outside, and I would get excited just knowing that baseball season was about to begin, and we’d be out there throwing and catching the ball and trying to crank out those home runs in Little League.

At this time, I really didn’t understand anything about religious reasoning, or even have a clue about what or who Jesus was. In my mind, churches were just places for people to be bored, or maybe go to a wedding. I never thought of them as places to worship a living God. That lack of knowledge leads you to think that the ways of the world are going to be your source to fill your needs and wants. This hit me when I became a teenager and started experimenting with alcohol. I started drinking when I was about 16 years old at a pretty regular rate. I thought the only way you could have fun was by going out partying every weekend and drinking until you couldn’t remember what happened. But even with that, I was very involved in sports at my school and during the summer.

When I finally graduated high school in 1989, I found myself without much going on in life I decided to join the Army National Guard as avionics mechanic, (communication and navigation repairmen of helicopters) and I really did love it. On top of everything else I found myself in the best shape of my life, and it really made me feel good about who I was and what I was about. I was still a heavy drinker on the weekends, in my mind that just made me a better and more fun person to be around. By the time I was 25 years old, I had a degree in electronics technology, a great job, playing ball and was loving life. I really thought it would never get any better than this. When you’re living the ways of the world you find yourself completely caught up in self-centeredness and will do anything to be able to please yourself. I will admit, I was one of these people. My life at this time was about what I could get out of it, and really didn’t mind who got hurt while doing it.

There was a day in September of 1996 that changed my life forever. It’s a beautiful Saturday night and was a beautiful Saturday night and I was enjoying myself having drinks at a wedding that I stood up in. I was all dressed up in my tuxedo, I was feeling no pain and it felt like nothing could ever get better than this. I’d had a little too much to drink but still thought I could drive home without a problem. As you’ll come to find out, I was a little off on my thinking. It was about two o’clock in the morning when I came to the on ramp to my house. Having slow reflexes at the time I made my turn too late and ended up hitting the gravel and rolling my Jeep. During the roll the roof collapsed and I ended up having a compound fracture of my right leg and dislocating the C4 vertebra in my neck. This crushed my spinal cord and left me unable to move anything below my neck. After spending a week in intensive care I’ll never forget the day the doctor came into my room and notified me that I was never going to be able to move anything below my neck again. All I could think about for a while after this was baseball.

During my time in rehab I acted like nothing was bothering me, but it was easy to see it was because I was refusing visits from my friends who wanted to come see me. It was just easier to tell them that everything was okay and to stay home and not worry. This attitude went on for about four to five years. Around April of 2001 things really seemed to have gotten out of control in my life. First of all, my grandpa had just had a stroke and heart attack, my dog had just died, and the girl I was dating had left me for one of my friends, all within a month. At this time, I had no clue where to turn, so I decided to try something new in my life and opened up a Bible and turned it straight to Proverbs. Verse 16:25 reads There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death. This verse helped me think so much. I really thought I was doing the right things in my life, but even five years after my accident I still hadn’t a clue.

I happened to find a flyer that was about a year old sitting in my drawer. It talked about a church here in Columbus called the Columbus Christian Fellowship. I’d never been to a church before so I thought I’d give it a shot. I ended up calling the pastor and setting up a meeting to come in that Sunday. Sunday came and I drove my wheelchair about 2 miles across town to check out this church. I was very pleasantly surprised that it was wheelchair accessible. The pastor and I talked for a little while, and then when the service came about I was intimidated but also moved and actually had a physical feeling of true comfort. Since I enjoyed the church so much the first time, I decided to keep going back. To this day I’m still part of that church. Now this is what the Heavenly Father can do for you. The pastor of the church at the time was Pastor Larry Campbell (if you’re not sure who Larry is, he is now a missionary for people with disabilities for Special Touch Ministry). One day, five months after I started attending church, I found myself sitting in the middle of the park crying (if you knew me, you would know that would be strange for me) and coming to grips with what I am. People may say or focus on my disability, but who I truly am is a child of God with an all loving, perfect God who loves me so much that he bled on a cross for me. Galatians 3:26 echoes this, for you are all children of God through faith in Jesus Christ. This verse is vital to me. Although I may have a physical shortcoming, if you read this verse there is one key word. That word is “all”, which tells us everybody NO MATTER THE SITUATION matter the situation can be a child of God.

I was able to overcome the looking upon myself with the world’s eyes and started to use the guidelines of the Bible for my life, finding myself no better or worse than even the greatest athletes in the world. Ever since finding Jesus my life has changed dramatically, both physically and spiritually. My God has blessed me and helps me see so much more clearly now. I’ve never been happier and have come to realize that although my disability can be hard sometimes, I’m so thankful for what my weakness has brought me. It’s been 12 years since my car accident and at this time I’ve recovered enough arm movement that I can drive. I am in the middle of getting my Masters degree and becoming licensed as a Christian counselor. I’m excited to start my new journey. So as you can see from the beginning of my story, which entailed chasing something that went into the heavens and realizing I would never catch it, I learned that when you have your Heavenly Father you will never lose Him.

I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis over 30 years ago.  I was frightened because I didn’t really know what that meant or what would happen to me. A friend of my parents had MS, and I could remember overhearing someone say when I was very young that it really would be better if he just died.  I didn’t know if I was going to die, and I didn’t know what would happen to me if I did.  I had gone to church all my life and knew about heaven, but I didn’t really know what I had to do to go there.  When I was in college some friends invited me to a prayer meeting, either thinking that I was already a Christian or (more likely) knowing that I wasn’t but needed to become one.  I saw things in their lives that I wanted in mine and in 1981 I gave my heart to Jesus.

I am now disabled and spend at least twelve hours every day sitting in my wheelchair.  My physical condition continues to deteriorate, and I need help with all my daily care including bathing, dressing, and usually eating.  My physical body doesn’t work very well any more, but physical healing is not something I think about very often.

Of course I believe God can heal me if that is His will.  Nothing is too hard for God, and if He chooses to heal my physical body He can do so in an instant of time.  But physical healing is not the greatest desire of my heart, nor is it usually the focus of my prayers.  My greatest desire is that God will use me – however and wherever He will.

I’ve been so privileged to see some of the ways God has used me, many of which simply would not have happened if I was not disabled.  When I started college I wanted to be a music teacher.  I became disabled just a few years later and gradually found that music therapy was really the path I needed and wanted to follow.  My career as a music therapist gave me opportunities to share the love of Jesus with more people than I can even remember.  My involvement with Special Touch in a few different capacities has also given me many such things as opportunities and has helped me grow as a Christian.  God has shown me that He truly can use “the weak things of this world.”

Since I stopped working in July of 2007 I’ve been searching for new ways that God might use me.  I am volunteering at the facility where I worked and praying that God will lead me in other directions as well.

I have already received the greatest (and only eternal) healing I will ever have on this earth.  God saved me and healed my soul over 25 years ago and has given me the sure hope of eternal life with Him.  Physical healing, which might make my life easier for a time, can’t begin to compare with the promise I already have.  I am so blessed.

Nancy Vyvyan

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